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Spontaneous Summer?

Well, here we are. Summer vacation. It’s always such a busload of expectations, isn’t it? There’s more to this season than just a pleasant change in the weather, I tell you. It means something. The school year, with all its frustrations and challenges, simply ends. No more pencils, no more books. The routine we were slave to all those months simply evaporates, with only a vague sense of “to be continued” hovering all the way over there in September. There’s a sense of closure, accomplishment, and escape, coupled with the slightest foreboding of new challenges.

Summer vacation is a universal transition, second only to New Year’s Eve. And while there’s no such thing as official Summer Resolutions, there might as well be. Think about it. We approach this season with goals in mind, whether it’s summer reading lists or an itinerary of day trips. We’ve got all that free time looming ahead of us, and we’re compelled to fill every corner of it with something productive. What’s up with that? Puritan work ethic? Keeping up with the Joneses? Fear of boredom?

I never thought I’d be one of those parents who’s hauling out the summer camp brochures in March. I was wrong. These last two summers, I had The Boy booked practically straight through – science camp, zoo camp, gardening camp, soccer camp, weekly playdates with his preschool friends, an ill-fated beach trip, and our annual Big East Coast Family Visit. Empty weeks on the calendar made me nervous. It was a big departure from the laid-back-attachment-mama thing I’d been going for, but I had my reasons. Sometimes, an entire summer of spontaneity can be a beautiful thing. Sometimes . . . not so much.

My first few summers as a parent were pure magic. We just floated from one thing to the next – strolls through the local farmer’s market, long afternoons at the beach or the public wading pool. But then I had another baby, The Boy was three, and suddenly we weren’t so seamlessly mobile anymore. Action-packed mornings on the playground were a thing of the past. It took forever to get out of the house, and when we did finally get to the playground, more often than not The Boy would huddle in my lap asking to go home. The beach was tricky, too, keeping the baby content while making sure The Boy didn’t stomp on other kids’ sandcastles or run off into the surf. (Turns out you can breastfeed a baby while chasing down a three-year-old, although I and your fellow beach-goers don’t recommend it.)

In retrospect, I think what we really could have used were some friends. I did make a few attempts to get together with other families. But conflicting schedules often got in the way, not to mention my own shyness and tendency to isolate when I’m feeling overwhelmed. So, that summer became a cautionary tale for me as I vowed that next year I would plan! And plan, I did.

It wasn’t such a bad thing, having every week on the calendar accounted for. The Boy had fun, made some friends, learned some random facts, and kept a steady flow of crafts coming into the house. But this summer, I think we’re all ready to scale back a little. He’s just finishing up his first year of full-day elementary school, and I’ve got to admit . . . I’ve kind of missed having the little guy around. I know his sister has, too. So, ready or not, here comes another spontaneous summer.

Well . . . not entirely spontaneous. There are a few Summer Resolutions in place. I'm determined to get them together with their friends more often – and to get myself together with some friends, too. Both kids are doing a few weeks at a co-op day camp, headed up by Teacher Tom and a dedicated bunch of parents. The Big East Coast Family Visit is on. The Boy actually wants to practice math and work on some books this summer (working titles: Attack of the Killer Brain and The Thirsty Radish.). Getting out of the house is still a challenge, but home isn’t such a bad place to be if we get stuck. We’ve got a playroom full of Legos and a backyard full of stomp rockets, after all. And, if all else fails, there’s always my favorite backyard game of Give One Kid a Hose and the Other Kid an Umbrella. I think we’re going to be okay.

And how about you? What are your Summer Resolutions?

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Tags: summer, summer vacation

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Comment by Gumbo Momma on June 19, 2010 at 8:14am: I would say most of our summer "planning" is done to prevent boredom. When the girl gets bored she tends to get a little out of hand, sometimes even destructive. She has to have an outlet for that energy, ya know?

Comment by The Oracle on June 19, 2010 at 10:45am: We're a need-to-plan family here. Like Gumbo Momma, if we don't plan, we get bored, which leads to too much TV and/or destruction and/or frayed nerves, which leads to me doing things I'm not proud of as a mother. I found this out over the winter when the Dragon had virtually nothing scheduled for four months. PAINFUL.

I have a few weeks of day camp planned (nature camp and zoo camp -- 2-3 days a week, 3-4 hours a day), two weekly lessons at the Y (gymnastics and swimming), Library Wednesdays, and am planning on filling the rest of the time with play dates. Hopefully involving children playing together and parents drinking together. Hopefully with some OSers!

Comment by The Oracle on June 19, 2010 at 10:47am: I also have a bunch of stuff planned for myself. Clearing the clutter, losing the last 15 of baby weight (it is TOO still baby weight!), doing some volunteer and paid work to get myself back in the market for a career. I joined a book club and am itching to do more writing and art-making and home redecorating and hiking.

Maybe I'm expecting too much of myself but after eight months of transition, it's nice to be excited about more than just unpacking a box.

Comment by Mamawho on June 22, 2010 at 7:38pm: We're not planners. GirlWho loves to sleep in and lounge around for a few hours in her undies, watching cartoons, reading, drawing. Then she goes outside and runs around the neighborhood with her friends. That's summer for us.

Comment by DLBK on June 23, 2010 at 11:34am: My son is 2, so no activity holds his interest for very long. We'll be going to a clay play class this summer, we're going away for a week to the beach with friends, and we might do a couple of day trips. Other than that we'll be going to the playground, playing in our yard, reading, having play dates, etc. Summer isn't that different for us at this age except for having nicer weather.

Comment by ks on June 23, 2010 at 12:02pm: We're booked pretty much the whole summer, but not entirely by plan. I like lazy summers, myself, but they don't seem to happen much these days.

I'm finished with my summer classes this week (yay, finally) and I start teaching next week. But the class I'm teaching is done by 11 am every day, so in the afternoons there will be trips to the pool and the museum and the zoo and movies and lazing about the house. The boys also go to day camp two days a week, just so that I get a quiet house and don't kill them.

But the fun starts now: this weekend is a camping trip to northern lower Michigan and next week my sister will be bringing her children to spend a couple of weeks with us and the boys are really looking forward to that. The weekend of the 4th, my mother in law is leaving (yay, finally, again--she's been here for 3 weeks already) and my dad is bringing his girlfriend up for the weekend. Then the next weekend my mom is coming to pick up the niece and nephew and the weekend after that we're driving out to her place. Then in August is my family reunion and then school starts back.

Comment by mcglory13 on June 23, 2010 at 12:11pm: We just moved and have guests here until the 1st. Then small one starts his new school, I spend 4 days doing as much work as I can and then I start teaching. That's the plan. :)

Spontaneous Summer?

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