I went to a bridal shower this weekend for my husband's cousin. Earl Grey's (my husband, for those of you who don't know) mother is one of seven kids, so there are lots of cousins--this one is the baby of Earl Grey's generation. She's a really sweet girl (22), though I don't know her well at all.
After arriving, the bride's mother went around the room introducing everyone and one woman from the groom's family looked familiar. Once she said her name was Christie, I started wondering if it was possibly the sister of a guy I dated in high school. I convinced myself it wasn't possible. The bride's family lives on the the east side of the mountains that border my city (I live on the west side of them) and I remembered that they guy I dated (we'll call him MethHead) grew up on the east side of the mountain and his mother still lived there when we dated. So, I started to get uncomfortable.
MethHead and I met when I was 15 going on 16 and he was 19 going on 20. <geek alert> I was in marching band and marched snare that year and we had music majors from the University who volunteered and led sectionals. MethHead was the drumline instructor that year. We spent a lot of time together, and I knew he liked me, but I was dating someone. I ultimately broke up with the guy to date MethHead. When we first met, MethHead's only vice was that he smoked. Other than that, he was completely clean cut, adamantly opposed to drugs, and the most polite thing you've ever seen. He loved his family and had two toddler-aged brothers whom he adored. It turned out that he had a sister named Christie who was born the day after me and after our mothers met, we realized that they shared a hospital room when we were born. Small world. MethHead treated me like a princess and he was madly in love with me and I fell hard for him. Of course, my mother did not approve of me dating a guy 4 years my senior, but, she seemed to like him well enough (though not his mother).
One week during the summer, just before band camp (I know, right?), my band director contacted MethHead and told him that he either had to stop dating me or he couldn't be the drumline section instructor the next year. I didn't understand the the problem--I was drum major that year, so we weren't going to be working directly with each other. But MethHead started avoiding me. For a couple of weeks he was really weird and in retrospect, over the entire summer, he'd changed some. He started complaining about his teeth a lot. He'd always had rather small teeth, but now he was in a lot of pain and was constantly complaining about them. I thought it was weird, but didn't think too much about it. One day, he completely stopped talking to me. I gave it about a week before I marched over to his apartment to find out what the hell was going on. Well, as you can imagine, we broke up. No explanation or anything, though. It was weird. He was also the only guy who ever broke up with me.
He stopped working with our band and he dropped out of college and I lost touch with him. I talked to his old roommate a few times (I really liked that guy and he had a crush on me-he should've been the one I dated) and he told me that MethHead had gotten into drugs, though he never said what. I found that so unbelievable because he was so adamantly opposed to drugs and had a cow if I smoked pot (now I know he was just trying to hide his problems).
The summer after my first year in college, some guy who was in the youth symphony with me during high school called me to ask me if I wanted to play in a quartet with him and some of the other music majors at my university. I told him I was interested and he said he'd get back to me about it, but first he had someone who wanted to talk to me. It was MethHead. Apparently they worked together at a pizza place (I vowed to never date another guy who worked at a pizza place after MethHead). The quartet offer was all just a premise for this asshole to talk to me. He must've been high when he called me. It was a bizarre, unwelcome conversation and he told me that he'd had all of his teeth pulled and now had dentures and fake teeth and he was so happy. Really?!?! YUCK! He wanted to take me out and luckily, I managed to avoid his future phone calls after that, but he certainly left me feeling disgusted every time he'd call. Now it is quite obvious to me that he was doing meth, hence the teeth problems. Also, there is a huge meth problem amongst those who live on the east side of the mountain, so it all made sense.
So, back to the bridal shower. I spent most of the shower avoiding Christie and her mother (the groom's sister and mother) and I'm not sure if she ever recognized me. When it was time to open gifts, the groom came and then it hit me how much he looked like MethHead. I had to tell somebody about this, so I told my mother-in-law and she got all excited and made it her mission to find out whether this was the same family. She asked the groom about his other siblings and their names, and sure enough, his oldest brother is MethHead. The groom was a toddler the last time I saw him, so that made made me feel a little old on top of it all. Hopefully this kids has his shit together. He seems to, but you never know. The sister, Christie, got pregnant at 14, so there's a whole lot of dysfunction in that family.
Now I have to contend with actually going to the wedding and seeing this guy. I so don't want to. Of all my ex-boyfriends, he's the only one I'm actually ashamed of. I'm debating not going just because I don't want to deal with the awkwardness. Moreso, I don't want to give that guy any reason whatsoever to contact me--I want nothing to do with him. I suppose it's self-indulgent to think that he would want to, but why even go there?
These were the kinds of things that I worried about when I'd think about moving back here. Inevitably, I do run into these situations.
Any weirdness in your lives?