"Well, when it comes to something as objective as the Earth being flat, you can fact check, and call appropriate bullshit. But when its whether or not HeathCare for all is a good idea...kinda tough. Either way, a strictly news organization would…"
"I compulsively throw things away. For instance, I get 100 emails a day from work. Most of my coworkers will delete 80 of them, keep 20 a day or so for the work week, save 5 a day in an important folder for later use. I delete everything but the most…"
"Hi there! Welcome to Offsprung! We'd love to get to know you -- please hop on over here and introduce yourself! And feel free to message Alan or me (the site owners) if you have any questions or problems with the site.
"Thanks for the read. Very enjoyable topic. I was just talking to a coworker who said Fox news maybe a tad bit opinionated, but when they present the news on the actual news programming shows, those are spot on. I said CNN is a wee bit more sensible,…"
"Malcolm Gladwell has a section in his book Outliers about being a star in the NBA. He talks about how if someone is 5'7" or so, they probably aren't going to play professionally. But, once you hit 6'6" or so, you have a…"
""oh, my kid loves vegetables"
I work 3 days on, 3 days off. And 5pm to 5am. So. I never have the same days off, and I am always tired. So when people talk about having weekends off, and actually sleeping in the middle of the night, I…"
"When I witnessed my son playing with his daycare class at the park, I realized my son was along a good deal of the time. I felt sad, as if the other kids must not want to play with him. Then, a nice boy comes up, and asks my son to play…"
I once got drunk and walked into city hall to pay a parking ticket, only to pass out in the lobby and spend the night in jail. I've carried the olympic torch. I used to play Cricket when I lived in Compton. I have a degree in Philosphy, and work on the railroad. I have seen two dead people after being shot on two separate occasions, but have never had to attend a funeral. When I met my wife, I texted her that I wanted to marry her. When she finally texted me back 6 months later, I did 2 months after that. I asked her to marry me, with another text. I grew up in really bad cities, but have never been in a real fight. I would like to one day, but I just never had a good reason to. I cry every time I watch the Jurassic Bark and Luck of the Fryish episodes of Futurama. And the Office UK finale. Bawl. I have a Hamster named Mochi AKA Hamsterdam, which I genuinely care for.
What's something about your kid(s) that makes you happy?
I have one child. 3. Sebastian Aleksander. And I love when he wants to dance with me when I play Built to Spill or Pavement. He is also learning to like Ghostface.
I love it when he will sing along to the Barcelona FC anthem in Catalan.
What's your most recent kid-related public humiliation?
Sebastian pretty much yells and raves every single time we go out to dinner. Super picky eater. To calm him down at his 3rd birthday dinner, we had to let him eat a whole big bag of Hot Cheetos in front of my family who I constantly criticize for eating fatty junk foods. Nothing too bad, really.
What about contemporary parenting culture pisses you off the most?
How hard it is to find COMMITTED parents who are kinda cool as well. Every fun dad I meet is a piece of shit dad who would rather be at a bar shooting pool than at home tucking his child into bed. And the people who seem to be involved parents watch shows like the Imagination Movers. And dress their children like they are build-a-bears instead of human beings.
Who were you BEFORE you became a parent?
A drunkard. A cheater. Basically. My wife and I have made complete turnarounds after the baby. One time we got drunk and climbed the scaffolds of an unfinished city hall building in Pasadena just to look over the city. Now, I would be scared to ride the metro without a ticket.
What are you nerdy about?
Hm. I tend to geek out on Soccer pretty badly.
Top 5 shows: Office UK, Curb Your Enthusiasm, Futurama, Arrested Development, Mr. Show.
Music I am listening to nowadays: Surfer Blood, Dananananaykroyd, Meth/Ghost/Rae, MGMT, Devendra Banhart, Two Gallants, Mountain Goats. Ya know?
Books: Malcolm Gladwell is my favorite writer. I enjoy works by the two Chucks: Palahniuk and Klosterman.
OPTIONAL: Do you have a sex life?
Regular married sex life sounds about right.
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Hi there! Welcome to Offsprung! We'd love to get to know you -- please hop on over here and introduce yourself! And feel free to message Alan or me (the site owners) if you have any questions or problems with the site.