"P.S. Insert standard fine print here about not using alcohol as a crutch, taking medications responsibly, and seeking assistance from the appropriate authorities when appropriate. I make jokes about this stuff, but I do take mental health seriously…"
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Alternadad's Discussions
What Happens When Kids Pay Attention To Your Bookshelf?
Started this discussion. Last reply by Teacher Tom Aug 29, 2009. 11 Replies 0 Likes
Alternadad's Page
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Profile Information
- About Me:
- I am the author of Alternadad and the founder of this here site.
- What's something about your kid(s) that makes you happy?
- His sense of humor.
- What's your most recent kid-related public humiliation?
- There's something new every day, and I don't want to update every day. Let's just say my life is constant humiliation.
- What about contemporary parenting culture pisses you off the most?
- Red-shirting kindergarteners. The belief that your child is somehow special.
- Who were you BEFORE you became a parent?
- The Greatest Living American Writer.
- What are you nerdy about?
- Yoga, weed, baseball, superheroes.
- Favorite music/books/TV/movies:
- Mad Men. Really, I need to list all the things I like here?
- OPTIONAL: Do you have a sex life?
- Define "life."
Alternadad's Blog
Parenting Through The Blues
Posted on June 6, 2010 at 9:37am 5 Comments 0 Likes
Dear Alternadad:
This question isn't just for me. It's for a lot of people I know who deal with this. How does one parent through depression?
Melancholic Mom
Dear Melancholic Mom:
Assuming that your depression isn't so bad that you need to be hospitalized, it's not really an option to abandon your parenting responsibilities. The one solace you can take is that your kids won't realize you're depressed. When you're weeping on the sofa in the middle of the… Continue
This question isn't just for me. It's for a lot of people I know who deal with this. How does one parent through depression?
Melancholic Mom
Dear Melancholic Mom:
Assuming that your depression isn't so bad that you need to be hospitalized, it's not really an option to abandon your parenting responsibilities. The one solace you can take is that your kids won't realize you're depressed. When you're weeping on the sofa in the middle of the… Continue
Yoga Tough Love
Posted on April 29, 2010 at 10:29am 4 Comments 0 Likes
Dear Alternadad:
Is there any point to Mommy and Baby Yoga, for the baby?
Yoga Mommy
Dear Yoga Mommy:
There are few yoga clichés I hate more than "kids are natural yogis." While its true that kids are generally more flexible and open-minded than adults, that doesn't make them "natural"… Continue
Is there any point to Mommy and Baby Yoga, for the baby?
Yoga Mommy
Dear Yoga Mommy:
There are few yoga clichés I hate more than "kids are natural yogis." While its true that kids are generally more flexible and open-minded than adults, that doesn't make them "natural"… Continue
Go Stoner Daddy!
Posted on September 24, 2009 at 9:00am 6 Comments 0 Likes
Hey, Neal. I'm considering a vaporizer, but I've tried the glass dome and was not impressed. Is the Silver Surfer really all that?
Well, I've been surfing happily for six years now, and I show no signs of stopping, though the company has also done everything it can to encourage product loyalty by occasionally sending me free paraphernalia. Honestly, some of my stoner friends consider using the Surfer a lot of work. You have to heat the wand a certain way and then you have to… Continue
Well, I've been surfing happily for six years now, and I show no signs of stopping, though the company has also done everything it can to encourage product loyalty by occasionally sending me free paraphernalia. Honestly, some of my stoner friends consider using the Surfer a lot of work. You have to heat the wand a certain way and then you have to… Continue
The Least Of Your Problems
Posted on September 8, 2009 at 10:49am 4 Comments 0 Likes
Dear Alternadad:
When they can reach tables, does life get more complicated?
Oh, for those days of parental innocence! I mean, of course life gets slightly more complicated when your child can reach a table. But really. If your biggest worry is whether or not your child is going to pull something off a table, then you're shitting in clover. The question could be rephrased as such: "When they choke their best friend in a playground argument, does life get more… Continue
When they can reach tables, does life get more complicated?
Oh, for those days of parental innocence! I mean, of course life gets slightly more complicated when your child can reach a table. But really. If your biggest worry is whether or not your child is going to pull something off a table, then you're shitting in clover. The question could be rephrased as such: "When they choke their best friend in a playground argument, does life get more… Continue
The Heartbreak Of Unwanted Guest Turds
Posted on August 26, 2009 at 3:06pm 7 Comments 0 Likes
Dear Alternadad:
Why is it when any of my son's friends come over for a play date, they all seem to like to use my bathroom for Number Two?
Unlike adults, who tend to only poop in their home toilet or in the well-appointed lobby stalls of high-end hotels, kids will lay down the law just about anywhere that's convenient, including park restroom stalls usually frequented only by the insane or the extremely sexually repressed. And if your son's friends are… Continue
Why is it when any of my son's friends come over for a play date, they all seem to like to use my bathroom for Number Two?
Unlike adults, who tend to only poop in their home toilet or in the well-appointed lobby stalls of high-end hotels, kids will lay down the law just about anywhere that's convenient, including park restroom stalls usually frequented only by the insane or the extremely sexually repressed. And if your son's friends are… Continue
Latest Activity
JTX commented on Alternadad's blog post 'Parenting Through The Blues'"Yes, yes and yes. The biggest problem with being a depressive at the same time you're parenting, is that parenting always comes first. No matter what, the kid still needs to be fed, cleaned, comforted, amused, etc ad nauseum. I have three kids,…"
Kristi commented on Alternadad's blog post 'Parenting Through The Blues'"My best defense was the gym. My friend whose husband had also been deployed recommended joining a gym with child care. The best part of her advice was when she reminded me that no one actually checks if you work out- go take a sauna, drink a bunch…"
Regina commented on Alternadad's blog post 'Parenting Through The Blues'"Great ips Altdad and FlrPie. Also, I think it's ok to say "Mommy is feeling a little sad right now." Sometimes this leads to questions about why, but it's a good chance to talk about feeling sad and not always knowing why.…"
Floor Pie commented on Alternadad's blog post 'Parenting Through The Blues'"Excellent advice. I've also found that letting the kids jump and climb on me actually helps elevate my mood. It's probably the same adrenaline rush I'd get from exercising or whatever, but I don't have to get up. It's…"
Parenting Through The Blues
Dear Alternadad:This question isn't just for me. It's for a lot of people I know who deal with this. How does one parent through depression?Melancholic MomDear Melancholic Mom:Assuming that your depression isn't so bad that you need to be hospitalized, it's not really an option to abandon your parenting responsibilities. The one solace you can take is that your kids won't realize you're depressed. When you're weeping on the sofa in the middle of the day--and haven't we all been there?--they…See More
Parenting Through The Blues
Dear Alternadad:This question isn't just for me. It's for a lot of people I know who deal with this. How does one parent through depression?Melancholic MomDear Melancholic Mom:Assuming that your depression isn't so bad that you need to be hospitalized, it's not really an option to abandon your parenting responsibilities. The one solace you can take is that your kids won't realize you're depressed. When you're weeping on the sofa in the middle of the day--and haven't we all been there?--they…See More
DLBK commented on Alternadad's blog post 'Yoga Tough Love'"I think Baby and Me anything class is to get the mom out of the house.
When I try to do yoga at home my toddler climbs on me, too! He likes downward dog because he can get on the floor below me; he also likes to do downward dog himself."
kommishoner commented on Alternadad's blog post 'Yoga Tough Love'"I could never get into mom-and-baby yoga. The little man just cried, and I felt mad because I'd blown 15 bucks and taken the subway just to sit on my stupid yoga mat breastfeeding. Coulda done that at home.
Now the little man does yoga at…"
Boring User Name commented on Alternadad's blog post 'Yoga Tough Love'"I never understood the Baby and Me yoga classes--especially ones that suggested I bring him in the car seat. Are there babies who are happy in there? My kid was only happy when he was in motion.
I did go to a pretty cute Toddler yoga class. The…"
Yoga Tough Love
Dear Alternadad:Is there any point to Mommy and Baby Yoga, for the baby?Yoga MommyDear Yoga Mommy:There are few yoga clichés I hate more than "kids are natural yogis." While its true that kids are generally more flexible and open-minded than adults, that doesn't make them "natural" anything. They don't want to do yoga any more than we do. TKV Desikachar has a story in his biography of his father, Sri Krishnamacharya, the father of modern hatha, or physical, yoga. One day young Desikachar, aged…See More
Yoga Tough Love
Dear Alternadad:Is there any point to Mommy and Baby Yoga, for the baby?Yoga MommyDear Yoga Mommy:There are few yoga clichés I hate more than "kids are natural yogis." While its true that kids are generally more flexible and open-minded than adults, that doesn't make them "natural" anything. They don't want to do yoga any more than we do. TKV Desikachar has a story in his biography of his father, Sri Krishnamacharya, the father of modern hatha, or physical, yoga. One day young Desikachar, aged…See More
"I've gotta counter CRJW's movie quote with my own favorite, which certainly also applies to parenting:
"It's supposed to be hard. If it wasn't hard, everyone would do it. The hard is what makes it great." - Jimmy…"
jomama74 commented on Alternadad's blog post 'Go Stoner Daddy!'"I really don't get all the 'hype' about mj accesories. I have tried too many to count and I find that I get the same results by blowing smoke into a baloon and passing it around! Joke, har hark!
No really though, According to recent…"
GXavier commented on Alternadad's blog post 'Go Stoner Daddy!'"Regina I heart you that is the very best way a gal can complain about her husband's weed."
Comment Wall (1 comment)
- At 12:49pm on September 24, 2009,
Julia Barton said…
- I registered under an assumed name, but the new Offsprung doesn't remember me...
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