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Sending Junior Off to College in Huggies
There's a wave running through my friends who all had kids about 2 and a half years ago. That wave is pee in a toilet. It seems everyone around me is potty training. I think I feel more pressure than my son. He could frankly care less. They tried putting him on the potty at daycare one day when he woke up dry from a nap, and he fell into the toilet. Since then he is very ANTI-TOILET. He thinks it's funny when we do it, but when I ask, "Do you want to go on the potty?" I get an emphatic NO. When I ask, "Have you pooped?" It's always a lie, a "nooooo" and then he runs into the corner.
My husband wants to bring out the potty chair, and just have him play with it, or sit him on it. I want to just forget about it until we can sit down and have a logical conversation with him that he won't be flushed. I figure once we bring that chair out we're officially "trying."
Also, what's with the shame? Toddler shame? How advanced! But the "everybody poops" line of thinking isn't working. I worry it's because we spent the majority of his life going "whoa that's NASTY!" when he has a huge poo.
So, share some stories of your potty training woes? When did you start? Did you stop and start? I now have friends that potty trained almost 2 year olds, but I have a friend who's son almost made it into to kindergarten still refusing the potty. He's now a normal 7 year old who doesn't wet himself and can wipe his own ass. Still, stories welcome.
My husband wants to bring out the potty chair, and just have him play with it, or sit him on it. I want to just forget about it until we can sit down and have a logical conversation with him that he won't be flushed. I figure once we bring that chair out we're officially "trying."
Also, what's with the shame? Toddler shame? How advanced! But the "everybody poops" line of thinking isn't working. I worry it's because we spent the majority of his life going "whoa that's NASTY!" when he has a huge poo.
So, share some stories of your potty training woes? When did you start? Did you stop and start? I now have friends that potty trained almost 2 year olds, but I have a friend who's son almost made it into to kindergarten still refusing the potty. He's now a normal 7 year old who doesn't wet himself and can wipe his own ass. Still, stories welcome.
Replies to This Discussion
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Permalink Reply by BunnyKrygowski on -
Going the laid-back route here. Got a super cheap red potty from Ikea for downstairs and another fancier one for the bathroom upstairs. Usually pre-bath we sit on the bathroom one and sing a song. A couple of times he's surprised himself (and me) and peed. 19 times out of 20, nothing happens and we move on.
The downstairs one he's used once or twice while "airing out the tush," between diapers. I know it's more fluke than anything at this stage in the game, but my hope is that if it's there with no big pressure or fanfare, just part of the day-to-day, then it won't be some huge struggle.
Then TODAY, while having a bit of diaper free time he went into the bathroom. I turned around and noticed he was in there, and by the time I made it in there (assuming I'd have to pull him out of the empty tub/dirty laundry/sink I realized he had sat on his potty and POOPED and with commendable aim. Maybe it's working? Or maybe just another fluke... it's probably too soon to tell. I'm trying to not get too excited.
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Permalink Reply by GGG on -
El D is 3 and for the first time today asked to go the bathroom in a public place. It was an epic fail in the restroom but I give us both points for effort.
It has been a slow but laid back process for us. I refuse to shame my kid into anything let alone figuring out the potty (not sayin' you are - I hear this on the playgrounds) We keep a potty on mat in living room (yep), school does their thing (and he now goes there regularly), before the bath, and if I think of it I'll ask. I've heard of parents holding potty boot camp of sorts... staying home an entire weekend and doing nothing but asking the kid if they have to go. I'd rather take a bullet but who knows may be that's how we'll get him to poop in the pot. But for now I'm happy with his pee in the pot.
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Permalink Reply by TommysMommy on -
Himself is 3-1/2 and we just trained him this past summer a month shy of his 3rd birthday. He had to be potty-trained for pre-school and I wanted him out of diapers before the 2nd one arrived. We talked about it for a long time and then just took one long weekend and did it. We used a "3 day potty" method I got off the internet and to my surprised, it worked rather well! After the first few days, we only had night accidents. We then had a resurgence of day accidents about a month after herself was born and he realized she wasn't going back to wherever she came from but since then, nothing.
We needed him to be trained but that was the only pressure. Screw other people. Again, what and when it's right for your family. We had the pre-school deadline.
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Permalink Reply by jenra on -
When people who have no reason to know whether or not your son is potty trained ask about it, you should excitedly ask them if THEY know how to poop on the potty yet.
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Permalink Reply by wookie on -
There's trying and there's TRYING. Getting out the chair and letting him sit periodically is a pretty laid back first step. Don't go for the big toilet if he's not ready for it. But if you wait for logic or phobias to go away before you try *anything*, you aren't doing him any favours either. Don't let the competit-mommies get to you.
At our daycare, the general thought was that once you were a preschooler (3?) they didn't really expect you to be trained, but the expectation was that you were at least starting to try, wether you were at the underwear-and-accidents stage or the "just sit there and read a book while I brush my teeth" stage didn't matter so much.
And personally? Poop is stinky and gross, and there is a point at which it is no longer socially acceptable to sit in a booty full of feces. I'm not saying we should harp on it and make kids neurotic, but I think it's ridiculous that we are somehow expected to pretend that our child's shit is sunshine and flowers. It's poop.
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Permalink Reply by Herasmus B. Dragon on
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We tried too hard with Big O, and if I'd backed odd she might have gotten it about 6 months earlier. She freaked about poopin in the potty, and I just didn't know that was a common thing. She went on strike, but finally did it just before her third birthday in three days of nakedness.
Ebay's potty use is casual. A daycare, where there are 4 kids within 6 month's age of each other, she's got them all in pullups and they all sit on the toilet every two hours. At home we do that on the weekends. Just being part of the regular schedule takes the.pressure off. I plan on doing Naked Days when it warms up. She LOVES wearing her underwear.
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Permalink Reply by mcglory13 on -
Had a four day holiday when kiddo was about 2 and 7 months. Told him we were done with the diapers. He had one melt down, but then did the three-day-method loosely or whatever (mostly it involved not wearing pants and staying home, it seemed) and were done with it. He occasionally has accidents (still!) when he's busy playing or tired and doesn't listen to his own cues, but for the most part he's good. It was embarrassingly easy.
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Permalink Reply by Kiwi on -
We introduced both kids to the potty around 2 1/2 by sitting them on it a few times a day. The closer we got to the their 3rd birthday we put them on my frequently. If they actually used the can then we made a huge deal about it with cheering and making a big show of putting a sticker potty chart (we made a sheet and tacked it to the wall). I found that if they had something to do (book to flip through, toy to play with) they would sit longer on the can.
1st Kid was fully trained about two months after his 3rd birthday and 2nd Kid was two weeks after turning 3.
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Permalink Reply by hermit crab on -
The bub potty-trained a little before his third birthday. No shame involved - except maybe for us, since our nutrition standards went entirely out the window. We did it by bribing with candy. Lots and lots of candy. First he got candy for sitting on the potty, which he hadn't wanted to do, then he got more candy for staying on it and trying to pee, and then he got even more candy for getting it in the pot. As each new step became more routine, I removed the incentive from the earlier stages to keep him motivated.
Since my mom trained all her kids with M&Ms I always assumed that this would be the route, but it took a while to find the right object of desire - the bub is not that food-oriented so we had to wait to find something that he really wanted.
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Permalink Reply by Mamawho on
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GW trained herself, almost overnight, right after she turned 3. I refused to have potty training be a huge angsty deal, so I just brought home a little potty and let her get used to it. She wasn't crazy about it. She wanted to sit on the big potty, so I got her the little seat. Nothing else was really said for a while. Then one day she said "potty" and disappeared. A minute later she came back and asked me to flush. It took a few weeks before she would pee in the potty, though. She did not like us praising her for using the potty, which I thought odd.
She had one accident and wet the bed once. That's it. I spent a few years waiting for the other shoe to drop.
My husband tells me he was trained through a game of sink the Cheerios. I think that's a hoot. I think that was how his dad taught him to aim while standing up, though.
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Permalink Reply by GGG on
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While I'm waiting for El D's poop epiphany until then I was going to start the cheerio target practice. Getting him to stand up and take aim is not coming easily though... he prefers to sit. *shrugs*
Mamawho said:GW trained herself, almost overnight, right after she turned 3. I refused to have potty training be a huge angsty deal, so I just brought home a little potty and let her get used to it. She wasn't crazy about it. She wanted to sit on the big potty, so I got her the little seat. Nothing else was really said for a while. Then one day she said "potty" and disappeared. A minute later she came back and asked me to flush. It took a few weeks before she would pee in the potty, though. She did not like us praising her for using the potty, which I thought odd.
She had one accident and wet the bed once. That's it. I spent a few years waiting for the other shoe to drop.
My husband tells me he was trained through a game of sink the Cheerios. I think that's a hoot. I think that was how his dad taught him to aim while standing up, though.
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Permalink Reply by kanachick on -
I sat my boys backward on the pot so everything was naturally aimed down and it made them feel more stable when they had to poop as well.
As far as when - #1 was just over 3, #2 was 2.4 and #3 was about 3 and 3 months. I just followed cues, let them lead and tried not to make a big deal out of it. In the end #3 responded well to stickers and a chart but I think he was just ready.
GG said:While I'm waiting for El D's poop epiphany until then I was going to start the cheerio target practice. Getting him to stand up and take aim is not coming easily though... he prefers to sit. *shrugs*
Mamawho said:GW trained herself, almost overnight, right after she turned 3. I refused to have potty training be a huge angsty deal, so I just brought home a little potty and let her get used to it. She wasn't crazy about it. She wanted to sit on the big potty, so I got her the little seat. Nothing else was really said for a while. Then one day she said "potty" and disappeared. A minute later she came back and asked me to flush. It took a few weeks before she would pee in the potty, though. She did not like us praising her for using the potty, which I thought odd.
She had one accident and wet the bed once. That's it. I spent a few years waiting for the other shoe to drop.
My husband tells me he was trained through a game of sink the Cheerios. I think that's a hoot. I think that was how his dad taught him to aim while standing up, though.
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