Indie Moms

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Permalink Reply by hermit crab on November 18, 2010 at 6:51am

I have discovered that parenting a three-year-old makes me very sour and direful towards new and impending parents. The constant physical exhaustion of pre-schooler parenting - fewer hours of sleep than earlier, plus RUNNING for the entire non-sleep portion of life - makes me a less pleasant person to be around. I'm definitely looking forward to being less of a downer, so here's hoping kana's right!


kanachick said:

Possibly, but I usually find that the people who are going on about how hard it still is are looking for some kind of medal for parenting and there just isn't one. It's not helpful to say to someone with a screaming baby that it never gets easier - you adjust, you learn new skills, it's like any new reality - the horror stories we share with each other about how it's alway so draining do not help a sleep deprived stressed out parent. Just getting a full night's sleep every night makes the lunches and the homework and the running around easier to handle.

I can see that for some people different stages are more challenging and of course, some people are dealing with extra issues that do make it more challenging but the general idea that parenting never gets better is unhealthy. I'm happy to shout that it's way better than it was.



wookie said:

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Permalink Reply by hermit crab on November 18, 2010 at 7:08am

And GG should get both a medal AND cookies.

Although I don't necessarily deserve them, I will also take cookies.

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Permalink Reply by kanachick on November 18, 2010 at 7:27am

Yes of course she does - and you can have all the cookies you want too.

My apologies. I just know people who are not Indie moms and who are not living with their parents and who do not have kids with special needs who feel that they have to bitch and moan about how hard things are when...they're not. Like the whole parenting culture has become either bragging about how fabulous everything is or bitching that everything sucks. No balance. Of course it's going to suck sometimes and of course it's going to be wonderful sometimes.

So. I apologize if my comments hurt anyone - you're all walking your own road.





hermit crab said:

And GG should get both a medal AND cookies.

Although I don't necessarily deserve them, I will also take cookies.

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Permalink Reply by G.G. on November 18, 2010 at 7:43am

Chocolate chip please... with walnuts.

Thanks but no apology was necessary. No hurt feelings here. Gotta do worse than that - I'm in HR. ;)
I like hearing different perspectives on parenting at different phases. Although you guys and your damn science project stories are freaking me out. Gawd, I hate those.
And you're right kana - it is a balance. I use my mom's term about marriage - peaks and valleys. And those people would complain about anything and parenting is just one more thing to bitch about...



kanachick said:

Yes of course she does - and you can have all the cookies you want too.

My apologies. I just know people who are not Indie moms and who are not living with their parents and who do not have kids with special needs who feel that they have to bitch and moan about how hard things are when...they're not. Like the whole parenting culture has become either bragging about how fabulous everything is or bitching that everything sucks. No balance. Of course it's going to suck sometimes and of course it's going to be wonderful sometimes.

So. I apologize if my comments hurt anyone - you're all walking your own road.





hermit crab said:

And GG should get both a medal AND cookies.

Although I don't necessarily deserve them, I will also take cookies.

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Permalink Reply by wookie on November 18, 2010 at 8:15am

I think honestly some people are just stuck in default "whine and complain" mode. It's their thing. Like Eeyore, but with more energy.

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Permalink Reply by Kiwi on November 18, 2010 at 9:19am

I second this.

I'll also third and fourth it.

wookie said:

I think honestly some people are just stuck in default "whine and complain" mode. It's their thing. Like Eeyore, but with more energy.

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Permalink Reply by Boring User Name on November 18, 2010 at 12:20pm

I also like the "indie moms" term. Single parents have some very unique challenges and I am in awe of you.

But I have to say, from someone who travels alone with the toddler frequently, the secret to success at the airport is to check the carseat.

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